The hits keep coming...

I've had a string of very bad luck over the past 6 months or so, but out of everything, the latest is the worst- my amazing, smart, plucky, fearless grandmother has Stage IV pancreatic cancer. I'm heartbroken. According to her, the worst part is that she can't eat ice cream anymore (she's having a really hard time keeping food down). Ice cream is her absolute favorite food- every year for Lent that's what she gives up. She was completely fine until just a few weeks ago. It's so awful.

I've been so, so blessed in that both of my grandparents have had exceptionally good health up until the past 5 years or so. They were both really active- just a few years ago we road-tripped around Minnesota together.

Then my grandfather started slowing down. It turns out that he's had a series of "mini-strokes"- so small he didn't even realize he was having them, but the cumulative effect was that dementia set in. My grandmother has picked up the slack and taken care of him. It's not like he doesn't know us or anything like that, but he can't do the day-to-day stuff anymore: drive, cook, etc. It's a cruel twist that my grandmother, who's been healthy as a horse until this, is now going downhill fast. My poor grandfather is going to be lost without her.


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STG gets adventurous

I survived Ethiopian food. And, dare I say...I liked it. One of the best first dates I've had, ever.

We had great conversation (helped in large part by the two bottles of wine we consumed). He mentioned a comedian who said something about how, in relationships, for the first six months you're not really dating the person, you're dating their "representative." Because at first people are acting on their best behavior and not really letting it all hang out. We both agreed we don't do the whole representative thing- I can't be bothered. Yes, I'm messy. And my dog is a pain in the neck. But love it or hate it, this is who I am.

So. I guess I'm about to put my money where my mouth is- he's stopping by (did I mention we live about a mile from each other?!) and I am in my pajamas. And glasses. And my hair's up in a ponytail. Yikes.

And Brewster? Is being psycho today. I left him in the car for 15-20 minutes (long story) and he CHEWED THROUGH HIS LEASH. All the way through.

No wonder I get migraines!




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Catch up

It's been a while. Things have been crazy in the 'hood. After much waiting, I finally got my new (to me, anyway) car!! Yes, I bought a car on eBay. No shame in my game- insurance companies don't pay out a whole lot when they total your '04 Jetta with 120k miles on it. And this girl has champagne taste on a Pabst Blue Ribbon budget. It's an '05, but only has 48k miles on it.




More exciting news: I have a date tonight. Not sure which is more shocking: that my eBay car finally arrived, or that I snagged myself a date. This picky eater is really nervous- he suggested an Ethiopian place. Things may not end well...

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Good Lord

I may or may not have drunk emailed my grandmother.

And by may, I mean I did.

Although I wouldn't say drunk emailed, per se...more like tipsy emailed.

And it was nothing offensive. It was umm...a bible verse. And a forwarded copy of Joel Osteen's daily affirmation.


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Let the good times roll

With today's unseasonably warm weather, my neighbors decided to start celebrating summer a little early. Since my house sits at the intersection where one street ends at mine - aka, a fairly big chunk of open space for the middle of the 'hood - the prime set-off spot for fireworks is riiight in front of my house. Awesome.

A more adventurous person would probably see it as a front row seat for the show. Me? Not so much. And Brewster? Definitely not. Since he's new to the 'hood, today was his initiation into the hellishness that is legalized fireworks. He was not a happy camper. First he just shook and tried to burrow next to me.







Then he got all weird and sat up staring at the couch cushions.


"If I can't see it, maybe it'll go away?!?"



This is him trying to hunker down.

If tonight was any indication, it's going to be a longggg summer. And I love summer. But I really don't like fireworks.


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Return of the prodigal son

My kid brother is moving back to town. And by "kid brother" I mean 30 years old. 30 going on 15.

It amazes me that we were raised in the same house, because we could not be more different. I'm the rule follower; he's the free spirit- pretty much the stereotypical oldest child/youngest child dynamic.

I love him dearly, but he drives me crazy. For starters, he's given my parents more than a few gray hairs. To put it bluntly, he really doesn't treat them well. At all. And that really bugs me. I may not always agree with them, but our parents have been amazingly good to both of us- they have always put us ahead of their own needs, and they've been there for both of us more than most other parents I know. Especially kid brother, who's had more scrapes and needed more bailing out than most. I wish he appreciated them a little more. Actually a lot more. Especially my dad, who's especially sensitive. And has a heart condition. (In my family, it's my dad who's the softie and my mom who's the tough one...kinda backwards. I'm much, much closer to my dad than I am to my mom.) I worry that one day my dad's going to have a stroke, because he gets so worked up over stuff kid brother does.

But. After years of fighting it, I've finally accepted that I can't change someone else. My brother is who he is. I don't have to agree with everything, but I can't make him do anything he doesn't want to do. Sometimes it makes me sad- I wish we were closer...or even close at all! I see some of my cousins, who take vacations together and genuinely enjoy hanging out with their siblings- it's like built-in best friends. But I can't force it, and I'm done setting myself up for failure and disappointment.

So now I just try to be there for him if needed, but not push too much. It's hard, because sometimes I want to slap him silly. Or slap my parents silly for enabling his bad behavior. But...I know they're all doing the best they can. My parents treat him much, much differently than they treat me, but I also have a much better relationship with them than my brother does.

This week - strike that, the past few weeks - has been ROUGH. Just way too much going on. Car shopping, insurance stuff, house stuff, work stuff, friend stuff...just way, way too much. And in the midst of everything, my parents were going crazy because they were trying to line up a job for kid brother. Which somehow I got roped into. (Don't ask.) Not what I needed.

So far 2012 has not been particularly kind to me. I'm really hoping that the second half gets better!! The good news is that despite all the craziness, I'm still standing. The house is still standing too, even though there are days I can't believe I signed on for all this.




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Mortified

Nothing like getting matched with someone you work with on eharmony. I am completely mortified right now!! I have a very iffy attitude about online dating- I'm really not sure about it, and feel a certain amount of...shame, I guess? So I try to keep it on the DL that I'm even doing it. I think this is a sign I need to get my butt off EH!!


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